Ego and selfishness – uttamhindu.com

Recently, in the daily newspaper, a 20-year-old student mentioned about the pressure being given by the parents regarding studies and the facilities provided to him. And because of not being able to bear their expectation from him, that boy saw the way of his salvation in suicide itself. One year after the death of the son, the situation of the parents has been depicted in the newspaper as follows. ‘Wife turns on flashlight from smartphone. This is my son’s room. He used to call it the cave. This is his study table. Two soiled T-shirts are lying on the bed. Some notes are pasted on the study table. Coaching time, some inspiring thoughts. He liked this room just like that. Please don’t touch anything. We neither touch nor allow to be touched. Then the husband comes. The room fills with light. Husband adjusts by pulling the chair. Wife screams – why are you lifting her chair? You must not touch any of his things. Wife says- You (husband) forced her to prepare for IIT. In defense, the husband says – My blood was inside it. He was good at maths and computer. I knew he would crack IIT. In fact, within a few months of coaching, the son started having anxiety attacks. Now he didn’t even play the guitar. He wanted to form his own band. Mother says – He was a big fan of BTS band. One of his friends went abroad to study music. But our son would spend hours in coaching or lock himself in his room. When he expressed his desire to study music, the father burst into anger. Smashed his guitar and broke it. Said – I gave you the best school, good life, good food. I just want one thing, after that again there was a fight. Father said – You have got an easy life. We fought and are at this stage today. Our son is a failure. On this the mother says in a broken voice – You have failed. I failed We failed. He didn’t lose, our status forced him to lose. Father interrupts – everyone has to bear the stress. He could not bear it. Angry mother says – are you still talking like this? Stop insulting him. She falls on the ground after guffawing. Sobs – now he will never come back. he left. The husband tried to console. However, he is also broken.

Due to not being able to bear the pressure of studies and parents’ expectations, the news of students committing suicide is published every day. J.Krishnamurthy writes about the selfishness of human beings- ‘Most of the human beings are selfish. They are not even aware of their selfishness, it is their way of life. Even if one knows that he is selfish, he hides it very carefully and lives according to the structure of the society, which itself is basically selfish. The selfish mind is very clever and crafty. Either it is ruthlessly and openly selfish or in its selfish pursuit of power, status and popularity, it associates itself with an ideology and a cause – all in the name of the public good. Selfishness is expressed in brutal rule if you are a tyrant and dictator. If you have a religious bent, then selfishness takes the form of worship, devotion, or allegiance to some sect or sect. This is equally evident in the family as well. The father pursues his selfishness through all means of life and the mother pursues her selfishness. Fame, prosperity and good looks form a base for the secretly moving movement of the center of selfishness, the ego.’

The problem of today’s parents is that they start behaving in such a way regarding the future of the children that they are ready to sacrifice their present for their future and many times this thing puts pressure on the hearts and minds of the children and when they face failure, instead of taking it as a new opportunity, they end their life by considering it as the last opportunity. After the death of the child, the life of the parents becomes aimless in a way. To avoid this situation, give the child the freedom to choose his own goal. Don’t impose your goal or your expectations on him because somewhere in him your ego and selfishness is hidden.

– Irwin Khanna (Chief Editor, Dainik Uttam Hindu)